On My Birthday

Palermo, Sicily

Tomorrow is my birthday. 29.

I love my birthday, because I get to connect with friends and family from all over the world. I am reminded of all the people I love and our memories together.

Today, I am a little bit sad. It has been a tough season, and I am still making my way out of the woods. It is okay, though, because dark seasons are part of our lives.

When I look back on this year, I can’t say I have regrets. We never know how things will turn out until they do. Instead, I am so proud of myself and who I have become. I have learned many lessons, and I want to make sure I remember them.

If I think about the next 365 days, who I want to be, what I want to do - I can’t even imagine. I can’t imagine where I will be, or what I will be doing, or who I will be surrounded by a year from now. If I will even be here. There were days I didn’t know if I would make it this far. And instead of letting the unpredictability of life itself frighten me, I hope that instead I can channel the uncertainty of it all into a sense of appreciation and importance: Life is to be lived, and it is to be lived today. Not tomorrow. Because tomorrow? It may never come.

I hope that next year I can read this letter and I damn well hope I will have listened to myself. Because I hate to think about wasted time, although it is no use wasting even more wishing we can go back.

This year, I want to give myself gifts: these are my wishes for me, and for you.

I hope you give yourself the gift of appreciation. Look at how far you have come. Look around, you are living the dreams you made come true. Look at all you have to be grateful for: your family, your friends, your health. Take nothing and no one for granted.

I hope you give yourself the gift of not worrying about what comes next. There’s not much you can do about it anyway. The only thing you can do is to do your best.

So on that note? Relax. Enjoy your life. Take it easy and let the little things go. Don’t give your attention to things that don’t matter. And don’t complain. Learn to look for the positive even when you think there’s nothing there. Remember, it could always be worse.

Live for today. Seize every opportunity you can. Spend your precious time with the people you love. Stay in touch with friends and family who live far away. When someone crosses your mind, reach out to them and let them know. Because you never know whose day your call could brighten up.

Prioritize what is important, and leave aside that which isn’t. Do the things that bring you joy, and say “no” to the things that don’t. And don’t feel guilty about it.

Choose yourself. You are your first priority. Stop, stop comparing yourself to other people, because you have no idea what their life is like and because it doesn’t matter. You are here to live your life and none other.

Be grateful. Say “thank God” when you wake up, and “thank God” when you go to sleep. Because nothing is promised to you.

Seize every beautiful moment you can. And know it won’t be all rainbows. Ride out the storms, relish them. Because even when you are so sad, even when it is painful, that is when you are growing.

Take care of yourself. Eat more plants and get out into nature. Go swimming, feel the sun warm your skin. Listen to music and get up and dance. Laugh, and laugh out loud.

Be open: your heart and your mind. Don’t close those doors you worked so hard to walk through. It can never happen for you if you don’t try.

Let people love you, and let people help you. But remember, no one can read your mind.

Smile more, say hi. You never know when a stranger can become a friend.

See the world: take new roads and try new things. Don’t stay at home. Don’t wonder - do. Get out and get going.

I have a lot I want to do here on this earth. And I don’t know how long I have to do it. So I can’t waste any more time.

There it is: for me and for you. All the things I wanted to tell myself as I enter my twenty-ninth year, all of the things I needed to hear.

love,

greer